Sexual empowerment is about making yourself stronger and more confident with your own sexuality and sex life. It’s a lot easier said than done though. Our media bombards us with images of perfections that have surely made an impact on our brains while we developed and while we exist today. They effect the way we feel and how we think of ourselves and can lead us to resenting the beautiful bodies we’ve been blessed with. This in turn, can negatively effect our sexual empowerment. Below are some ways to start appreciating your body so that you can feel attractive and empowered sexually. Keep in mind, the ideas below can be of help to both men and women, whether you’re in a committed relationship or not.
Learn to love and accept your body.
Each one of us could stand in front of the mirror naked and begin naming things that we dislike about our bodies. But then we walk away from the mirror feeling awful about our precious temple! This may take some practice, but stand in front of that mirror and proudly look at your body. Remind yourself of all the good your body has to offer. It can be the smallest of appreciations, like loving your cute-shaped ears or the freckles on your shoulders. Repeat mantras that reaffirm that you’re sexual being each day while you shower or while rubbing lotion on your body. When you love and appreciate your body, others will too!
Wear sexy underwear.
After reading this head to your underwear drawer and sift through the good undies and the bad. Those big ol’ grannie panties (or torn, worn boxers) have run their course so chuck them in the trash. Go underwear shopping and treat yourself to some new, exciting pieces. Find patterns or colors that attract you or styles that turn you on. Wearing sexy underwear even on just a normal day of work can still help to make you feel desirable, not to mention if you’re partner gets to enjoy the new threads on your hot bod.
Give yourself a good trim.
Fellas, this isn’t just for you and your beards. This one goes out to both guys and gals about trimming or shaving your private “terrain”. That 70’s bush can be a lot to work with and a good trim can lighten up the area making you feel a little more frisky!
Nothing is hotter than a massage, especially when it’s with an all natural oil. Keep a jar of coconut oil next to your bedside and give yourself or your partner a good rubdown with this sweet and luscious scented oil. Feel free to use it as a lube, too! (Unfortunately, coconut oil is incompatible with condoms or a diaphragm.) The power of touch can be healing, sensual and make us feel both appreciated and loved. Think about it, touching lets you know that your partner is involved in you and a validation that you’re beautiful!
Let go of distractions and be in your body.
Multi-tasking is a great quality to have in different areas of our life…but not when it comes to gettin’ busy. While being intimate, concentrate on being present in that very moment. Tune in to each one of your senses – touch, smell, taste, and listen to all that you’re experiencing. When thoughts creep in about what happened that day, what you have to do tomorrow, who you forgot to call back, etc., begin to breathe and let those thoughts fade away. Stay focused and enjoy!
Do NOT compare yourself to porn-stars or models.
Just don’t. Both sexes involved in porn are primped and primed with makeup, tanning sessions, hair stylists, etc., before their shot. Uhh, that’s not real life. The uniqueness of your body is alluring and so is your pale skin or seductive curves.
Eat some chocolate to set the mood.
Raw dark chocolate to be exact. For the true chocoholic, just thinking about chocolate can evoke a pleasurable response, so imagine what it can do to our sex drive! Having a healthy libido will only help to make you feel sexier and hopefully empowered! Check out the recipe below for a tantalizing desert that will get your libido fired up.
Try these aphrodisiac chocolate treats and bring increased libido to your sex life. Serve them on a small dish with fresh, organic strawberries and feed them to your partner to get the fun started.
Aphrodisiac Chocolate Treats
Ingredients: 8 dates, pitted
1 cup walnuts
2 tablespoons raw cacao or cocoa powder
1.5 tablespoons maple syrup or honey
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
Dash of sea salt
Dash of chili powder
Directions: Put all the ingredients into a food processor and pulse until evenly combined and crumby. Form into balls and serve.
Benefits of aphrodisiac foods: Chocolate contains a compound called phenylethylamine, which is a natural antidepressant. It’s also a rich source of anandamide, which promotes bliss.
The chili powder contains a concentrated form of the chemical capsaicin, which increases the heart rate and causes you to sweat as well as boosts the sensitivity of nerve endings. These reactions together reflect what the body experiences during sex. Capsaicin also fuels the release of endorphins, which are neurotransmitters that provide you with a natural high. Above all, capsaicin gives a fiery kick to your taste buds and body, enough to warm you up and get you in the mood!
Walnuts have been considered to have aphrodisiac properties since Roman times. They contribute to improved blood circulation and are high in protein, potassium, zinc and iron. Arginine, an amino acid in walnuts, is absorbed by the body and transformed into nitric acid, which helps to dilate blood vessels and increase blood flow.
By the Conscious Connection’s Resident Holistic Health & Yoga Expert, Lauren Forney, HHC, RYT